Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Happy Anniversary

It has been one year to the day since I started this blog. When I started this project my goals were to dominate the internet, re-define the standards of technology and entertainment, and make a ton of money. Although I admit I have failed miserably in all of these areas, at least I left the critics dumbfounded with my consistent and conscientious blogging efforts. Yes, this is a real blog not just one where you sign up with an initial entry and forget about it until you are rocking your grand kids on your lap and suddenly remember in horror that you have neglected your blog for the last 50 years.

If you are new to my blog I will list my top 10 favorite prior entries which include an asterisk (not asterix) if I feel they were unappreciated or received little or no feedback. This entry is a celebration not a cheap attempt to turn you onto my re-runs . I think Saturday Night Live is the worst re-run offender. They have maybe 5 or 6 shows each season and just show reruns the rest of the year and bill them as "encore performances". Anyway, here are what I believe were my top 10 blog entries from the last 28 + entries.

10. Jealous about Money
9. The Real NBA Top 50
8. Talk Radio
7. Video Game Frustrations
6. The Enneagram*
5. Rival Movies
4. Evil Twins
3. Least Motivating Songs*
2. MMA*
1. Movie Pet Peeves*

So after an unbelievable year you are probably asking what is next for me. I've had a lot of offers from Hollywood to write movie scripts and sit coms, acting opportunities and body double/stunt work for Vin Diesel and Mark Whalberg, but I have turned them all down in order to stay loyal to my blog. I stand vigilant as the lone sentinel in a troubled world. Wherever people suffer, I will be there. Whenever someone needs movie trivia, cheering up, or the ramblings of a twisted mind, you know where to find me.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

The Parental Video Curse

In the early 80's my family would rent videos on the weekend. We would also rent a VCR since they were so new and not everyone owned one back then. I remember watching the same video 2 and 3 times in a row like I see my kids doing today. I also remember the feeling of watching a movie and just as an uncomfortable part (swearing, sex, or nudity) would come on my parents would always come walking in the room. These were not bad movies we watched. This would happen regardless of what they were rated. You could rent some rated G Disney movie and Polyanna will start doing some inappropriate nasty dance as soon as a parent came in the room. (Not that Polyana ever did that and not that I ever rented it).

On one occasion I was at a friends house with several others watching a murder mystery which was very entertaining. My friend's Dad came in and sat down and within 15 seconds of that time there was a major shift in the direction and content of the movie and it got extremely uncomfortable. I just remember the TV ended up getting turned off and our video party was over. I walked home in a daze wondering what had happened and where that scene came from. I now know that it was just the parental video curse.

I remember when my brother in law rented Conan the Barbarian and later brought it by our house. I didn't even think about the rating and I started watching it with my friend Sam. We didn't get too far into when my Dad came downstairs and sat down. I remember Conan had killed some guys in a competition and his slave masters brought a lady wearing a leather/fur bikini to his cage to reward him. My spidey senses kicked in and I knew where this might lead so I said "I just remember I am supposed to draw a basketball for my art class" and I ran out of the room. I left my friend with my Dad and came back about 10 minutes later. Sam was red in the face with a mixture of embarrasment and anger and was furious with me. My Dad suggested we turn the movie off. I never did see how that movie ended but I'm still glad I took off when I did and Sam is still mad at me for ditching him during such an uncomfortable situation.

Another thing I have noticed over the years is how we forget so much about a movie we saw a long time ago. Many times I have told someone how much I enjoyed a certain video I saw when I was younger so I recommend it to them or rent it for myself and later find myself saying "I don't ever remember that scene" or "I had no idea they swore so much in this", or "I promise this is rated PG". Some examples of movies that I have been surprised to re-watch 20 years later are: Logan's Run, Agatha Christie movies, Clash of the Titans, Jaws, Monty Python, Dragon Slayer, Benny Hill, Airplane, 16 Candles, Invasion of the Body Snatchers, etc. There were alot of movies made in the 70's and 80's that were rated PG that today would be PG-13 or R, but I am not going to complain about MPAA rating inconsistencies now. That can be a topic for another day.

I just wanted to give a heads up to all the young people out there and let them know next time you are planning a video (DVD) party go to IMDB or screenit first for content details because your parents will walk in the room at the very most inopportune moment.