I go into a small diner and asking the waitress if they sell Turkish Delight. She says "My aunt in Montana used to make it for me". I then take the pen out of my pocket and place it on the table. She hands me a bill and walks away. I slowly get up and take it out to my car. I decode the numbers on the bill and type the priority access code into my cell phone. A computer voice says "commencing security clearance". A live person then comes on the line and I say "Special Ops Agent TFR Tango Foxtrot Romeo, recommending we initiate defense procedures and upgrade to a code yellow." I then look across the parking lot and see a delivery van with tinted windows that had been parked there for a while. The problem is the store where it is parked is closed. Through the miracle of technology which I am not able to disclose here, I can see the driver is wearing an earpiece. We make eye contact and he panics and pulls out of the parking lot. I then report in "The mission is compromised, upgrade to code red! Terminate all communications!" I peel out and follow the van. As I speed up I tell my kids to put their seat belts on and to quit arguing with each other and I wake up to reality.
Even any office job is more exciting when someone pages you and instead of telling you that your 2:00 pm appointment is here they say "The package is in the open" or "the eagle has landed, this is not a test". I guess I've just seen too many James Bond, Mission Impossible, and Bourne Identify movies over the years. As you can probably guess I really relate to Calvin and Hobbes. I will try to keep my spy fantasies to a minimum, especially since I keep getting in trouble for answering the phone and saying "Is this a secure line?"