Miss Teen South Carolina became a favorite reference last year with her famous answer to the question why most Americans can't locate Iraq on a map. Since hearing her response, every time I hear the words "such as" it brings a smile to my face. Her response has brought me more happiness than I could have ever expected. I am not judging her because I have said and done many not so bright things during my life. Where to begin...?
I have an experience I'd like to share about cutting down trees. I had two giant trees in my front yard that both died several years ago. After their demise they looked like scary Tim Burton Halloween trees year round so I decided it was time to cut them down. I understand that anybody could have just cut them down with a chainsaw, but it takes a real man and do it the old Fashioned Way.
I had a tiny hand saw and climbed up into the top of the tree and proceeded to cut small pieces off and work my way down. After several weeks of neighbors driving by and either laughing or shaking their heads in disgust I finished the project. The $12 saw I used was only about 14 inches long and was completely dull when I finished. A neighbor with a chainsaw came over out of pity when he saw I had made it down to the trunks and he didn't have the heart to watch me continue.
I had forgotten about this experience until I came across a picture that my wife had taken. She was kind enough to immortalize the experience so some day my great grand children can look at the picture and know they come from a superior gene pool. So next time you need to cut down a tree, either hire a professional or at least keep the paparazzi away if you are going to look foolish doing it yourself.