Monday, June 7, 2010

Death Metal: They can't be serious

The 80's was a great time to grow up. I think the best contribution from that time period was the music. I was recently thinking of heavy metal music and how it has gotten worse evolved over time. When I was young, the artists with the worst reputations and the heaviest style of music were groups like AC/DC, Iron Maiden, Ozzy Osbourne, and Motley Crue. Compared to the death metal groups of today, these bands were just pansies, pretty boys, or posers.

I don't understand death metal. Could you possibly have a worse sound? It usually consists of a guy making horrible noises like growling and screaming and clearing his throat into the microphone with an intense background music of drums and guitars that sound more like machine gun fire than music. It sounds like Satan vomiting. Sharing my opinion about this "music" probably makes me sound like an old man, but I can still appreciate some occasional hard rock. It's not like I'm an Air Supply or John Tesh guy. (No offense if they are reading this post.)

As usual I think Strong Bad does a great job with his analysis of this genre of music. If you are not a Homestar Runner fan, don't click on that link. There is a lot of truth to it, but it is kind of obnoxious. In an effort to boycott the death metal genre, I am putting up a cute picture of kittens and flowers on this post instead of the scary demonic images associated with this music. Now if you will excuse me, I have to go listen to Death Reaper and their new hit single Bubonic Pustule.

8 comments:

Kelly said...

I LOVE home star runner. Thanks for bringing that one to my attention. Thanks also for those lovely kittens and flowers. Also a favorite. Rock on!

ISRAEL CARRASCO said...

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Ocean Girl said...

There was an Iron Maiden song that I so loved in the 80s. What was it? Love Hurts?

Eric said...

To call something music (at least for me), it must have a melody, counterpoint harmony, and has to have more than two chords associated.

Death metal and rap usually almost never meet these criteria, although many rappers over the years have sampled real music to include in their own mash up.

RenegadeExpress said...

This is closed-minded. You forgot to say what the melodic singing sounds like.

K. said...

You say 'sounds like Satan vomiting' like it's a bad thing.

Anonymous said...

You don't know what Death Metal is, you moron.

RenegadeExpress said...

Mr. Anonymous is so right. And Eric, I could refer you to many death metal songs with all three of those things.